Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

This isn’t Democrats spending madly. This is government catching up.

Oh FFS you might as well trust a 6-year-old with a flamethrower.

if you can’t see it, then you are useless in the fight to stop it.

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

Too often we hand the biggest microphones to the cynics and the critics who delight in declaring failure.

Reality always gets a vote in the end.

One lie, alone, tears the fabric of reality.

When they say they are pro-life, they do not mean yours.

Dear media: perhaps we ought to let Donald Trump speak for himself!

Republicans want to make it harder to vote and easier for them to cheat.

This really is a full service blog.

Compromise? There is no middle ground between a firefighter and an arsonist.

There are no moderate republicans – only extremists and cowards.

If rights aren’t universal, they are privilege, not rights.

Dumb motherfuckers cannot understand a consequence that most 4 year olds have fully sorted out.

Everything is totally normal and fine!!!

Republicans in disarray!

It is not hopeless, and we are not helpless.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires.

Let me file that under fuck it.

My years-long effort to drive family and friends away has really paid off this year.

Nancy smash is sick of your bullshit.

You’re just a puppy masquerading as an old coot.

All hail the time of the bunny!

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What You All Wanted

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Here is ABL blowing kisses at Tunch, but he’ll have none of it because A.) he knows he is being posed and B.) he knows how allergic ABL is to cats. He’s a lover like that:

I like how Lily is slutting around with Heather, who is ABl’s friend from Houston who is coming with us on the trip to referee and stop the fights when they get to the TKO point.

Reader Interactions

67Comments

  2. 2.

    mai naem

    This blowing kisses at Tunchmeister is all fine and dandy but what did y’all do with Rosie Posie? I thought you guys were in Charlotte already. What did I miss?

  4. 4.

    Geeno

    Was ABL too high strung for Lily?
    Or is Heather just a “dog person” like me that dogs just seem to hang with. Whether you like the dog or not.

    Seriously, I’ve had dogs I loathed hang with me in preference to their owners. I’ve always tried to believe it was because their owners sucked, and even the dog knew it.

    ETA: Not that that would be the case here – it’s always been obvious how much Lily and Cole belong together. I’m +8 now and not expressing myself well.

  7. 7.

    The Dangerman

    Excellent expressions! We have “that’s not edible”, “shit, he really IS that big”, and “what in the fuck have I got myself involved in” (no need to attribute the expressions to the faces, of course).

  8. 8.

    Geeno

    I get the sense that ABL is lovin’ on Tunch, and Tunch is just accepting it as the way things ought to be.
    “of course, you adore me. I’m Tunch”

  9. 9.

    mai naem

    @suzanne: Ooh, is this going to turn into a mexican novella with affairs, weddings, love quadarangles and long lost/unknown parents/siblings showing up all done with a huge dollop of overacting.

  14. 14.

    Corner Stone

    @suzanne:

    Tell us more about Heather. I sense a love triangle here

    Yes. Tell us more about Heather from Houston.
    {shifty side eye}

  15. 15.

    Corner Stone

    Even though I already know the answer to this, I am forced to ask, “Who and/or what is ‘tunhabl'” ?

  17. 17.

    sfinny

    Well my cat spends almost the entire time that anyone is in the apartment under my bed. So at least Tunch was out and about.

  18. 18.

    Brachiator

    This shit is so sweet that I am going to have to get my blood sugar checked. And going to the emergency room on a holiday weekend costs mucho Romney bucks.

    These are some seriously great photos.

    Hope everybody has a wonderful time.

  19. 19.

    Heather

    @Corner Stone: Don’t look at me. Look at that pretty lady who is drawn inexorably closer to the event horizon created by a cat so large he has his own gravity well.

    I do Imani’s image management/PR stuff, handle all her websites, and also serve the honorable role of white lady she can call and yell at so she doesn’t go ham sammich on certain people. Not naming names. Just saying. That look in my eye means: I WILL CUT CERTAIN PEOPLE.

    Also, I’m drinking all of John Cole’s diet green tea.

    Now you know everything you could possibly want to know.

  21. 21.

    Davebo

    I’m depressed. I turned my wife on to ABL who she now follows fastidiously.

    And now she’s hanging out with John’s various critters.

    What’s a guy to do.

    Doei

  24. 24.

    ? Martin

    I think this should be a new thing. Since Cole doesn’t care for interacting with humans when he’s on the road (unless they’re 21 year old readheads – excellent choice, mind you) we should have a contest where the 3 winning commenters travel to WV and sleep on Cole’s sofa for Labor Day weekend each year.

  25. 25.

    suzanne

    @Yutsano: Shiiiiiit. I am missing the best party EVAH. Can y’all come out to PHX next and we can all throw down? Maybe even enjoy some naked mopping?

  27. 27.

    The Dangerman

    Will you be going near Baltimore? If so, could you pick up some Raven’s gear for me? Extra credit given if you can get the Blogmaster tipsy enough to wear it for a picture.

  28. 28.

    Heather

    @Geeno: I suspect Lily’s affection was not for me in any particular sense. Her particular love was for the warm air coming out of my laptop’s vent.

  31. 31.

    eemom

    @Corner Stone:

    NGH. He’s far too busy these days knocking himself out trying to sound highbrow enough for his new Guardian audience.

    Srsly, he is. It’s fucking hilarious.

  33. 33.

    Yutsano

    @suzanne: Heh. I’m getting mild pressure to head down that way. It will have to wait until things are much less insane at work though. Plus wifey don’t do heat. At all.

  34. 34.

    Violet

    I’m loving this trip and it’s hardly started. Good to meet you Heather. You’ve got quite a job minding these two. It is like a telenovela. Who’s riding in on a horse?

  35. 35.

    Bnut

    It looks like Tunch has ABL on retainer and is getting advice on how to deal the eventual murder of JC. Be afraid John, it’s an inside job.

    Oh, and Roll Tide.

  38. 38.

    Mnemosyne

    @Yutsano:

    She might be okay visiting somewhere in the November/December/January nexus, because it gets fucking COLD in the desert in the winter. Like, a sprinkling of snow on the desert cold, which would probably be like a warm summer day for asiangrrlmn.

  40. 40.

    stibbert

    yow, Heather – good luck w/ the referee action, ABL+Cole will stay calm if they are fed regularly.

    ntm that you’re gonna develop a fan-base of your own, folks who’d be willing to curl up beside your laptop’s vent.

  41. 41.

    Dee Loralei IPhone

    I’m envious that looks like so much fun! I have a gold ticket to Thursday nights Obama speech. Felt like Charlie in Willie Wonka, ” I’ve got the golden ticket!” (in my defense, there were three differently colored tickets, and Gold is best.)
    But now, I don’t think I can use it. My dad isn’t 100%, and I feel it’s too much of a burden to dump everything on my mom for a few days. So, I’ll be living vicariously through ABL & John Cole at the DNC .
    But my beloved Sooners eventuallly won! So I got that going for me.

  42. 42.

    Paul W.

    Not relevant to your predicament, but ive spent the last part of the night listening to les miserables (the musical) and sobbing at the beauty of it. I can’t think of two more poignant characters than Jean Valjean and Eponine. Just writing their names makes me tear up. I wish everyone a beautiful night, can’t wait to see dem convention coverage!!

  44. 44.

    Arundel

    Imani (ABL) may I say how lovely you are, and your writing and journalism just gets better and better. I was someone critical of some of your things a while ago here, but it is wonderful to see you flowering, getting better, honing your craft with words. I’m rooting for you, and you’re a beautiful, smart lady. Knock ’em dead, dear. My very best to you, lovely lady.

  45. 45.

    Heather

    @eemom: inorite? He writes like he’s affecting an English accent in his head.

    @The prophet Nostradumbass: Don’t be absurd. We would never do such a horrible thing. It’s a rental. Obviously, we would put him in a special carrier strapped to the roof and hose him down every 100 miles or so as needed.

    @stibbert: No one should want to be a fan of me. To begin with, I’m terrifically uninteresting. But perhaps more importantly, despite appearances in this picture, I do not actually come equipped with a factory-installed heating element available for public use.

    Just let that idea marinate a little while to explore all the potential levels of meaning in that remark. And then go make a generous donation to ABL’s fundraiser on her blog. DO IT NOW OR I WILL LOOK AT YOU IN A MEAN WAY.

    See how good I am at this PR thing? This is why I’m on this trip.

    Also, I microwave the sausages when Imani gets 3am munchies.

  47. 47.

    ? Martin

    @Jewish Steel: I was really hoping we could sic BOB, unlimited corporate cash, and loko atreides on him. That’d be infinitely entertaining to read about for the next 3 weeks.

  48. 48.

    Warren Terra

    I’m sure Heather is a lovely person, I hope she has a great time, and her inclusion as a referee and moderator is probably wise.

    Still, I can’t help but regret that her inclusion makes this “road trip of a sometimes drunken scribbler to a national convention with his ethnic minority lawyer friend from Los Angeles” a bit less like Fear And Loathing . I don’t suppose she is, or can pretend to be, a poor Okie kid who’s never ridden in a convertible, possibly wearing a Mickey Mouse T-shirt? Or failing that, a freelance photographer named Lacerda?

  51. 51.

    Citizen_X

    @Joshua Norton: Yes, by all means! Imani and Heather: drag Mr. Naked Mopper to the Wonkette event. (Details here.) Don’t let him weasel out of it. ABL ‘n Heather, + Cole, + Rebecca from Wonkette? Some kind of unstoppable chain reaction will be unleashed.

  52. 52.

    jheartney

    What happened to ABL’s feet? She looks like she is growing out of the couch. Could this be Photoshop?

  53. 53.

    hep kitty

    You lucky bastidges! Have fun!

    What are you going to do? Live blog. Whut? Sorry, I haven’t been following this. Was still reveling in the aftermath of RNC convention.

  55. 55.

    JoeK

    @stibbert:

    Dude. I’m sure you didn’t mean to sound creepy, but that totally fails the “Would I want some random guy saying this to my daughter?” test.

    ETA: I see Heather is more than capable of fighting her own battles. I shall butt out now.

  56. 56.

    taylormattd

    @Quaker in a Basement: LMAO. This might make me actually watch some of the convention coverage, just to see if the news teams end up breaking away to cover whatever near-international incident these two cause.

  58. 58.

    Corner Stone

    @Heather:

    Now you know everything you could possibly want to know.

    That’s hardly true. Don’t think you can just side eye us bathed in the soft monitor glow of a 17in portable desktop and saunter away so easily.

  59. 59.

    Corner Stone

    It looks like ABL is trying to interrogate Tunch.
    “Where were you on the night of Tuesday, April 12th 2008?!”
    “Wewrrr”
    “Ha! I knew it all along!”

  61. 61.

    trollhattan

    I went to bed too early and missed all the fun. Trouble’s a-brewin’ in West Virginia–the next few days should be fascinating.

    Also, too, Tunch creates quite a dent in that sofa arm.

  62. 62.

    schrodinger's cat

    I is on your sofa bending the space-time continuum.
    -Tunch

    Your offering displeases me, please try again.

  64. 64.

    Faux News

    I know ABL means well by cooing and courting Mr. Tunch. However I sense Tunch is in one of his “I will NOT be objectified” moods. Tunch looks like he is getting huffy.

  67. 67.

    Quaker in a Basement

    @taylormattd: THANK YOU! I was beginning to think my comedic stylings were going to go entirely unacknowledged. People, COME ON! She lost a bet? Jesus, tough room.

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