Gods bless “The Editors” at Esquire, and all those whose acrid dyspepsia battles the saccharine lather bathing this weekend’s Republican freakshow:
Two remarkable events occurred over the past month that, taken together, give us all some idea of the forces gathering even now among Republicans and conservatives as they begin the long — and, if you’re a political consultant or a local TV station in Nashua, New Hampshire, very lucrative — process of trying to find someone to run against Barack Obama in 2012. The first is a now marginally viral video of a focus group brought together for Sean Hannity by Frank Luntz, the boyish charlatan who’s been concocting spin for conservative candidates and causes for what seems like a century now, but who still manages to look like the evil Cleaver brother. Anyway, Luntz got a group together made up of people who are likely to be voting in the Iowa caucuses, a quadrennial gathering of snowbound Caucasians given entirely too much responsibility for winnowing the field of candidates prior to the whole shebang’s moving along to the even crankier white people of New Hampshire. An unhealthy number of the people in the group told Luntz that they believed that the president was a Muslim. This made even Luntz’s wattles quiver, and Hannity felt compelled to step in and explain that, as far as he was concerned, the president was not a follower of The Prophet, but merely an adherent to a radical form of Christianity devoted to the Gospel According to John Shaft.
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Not long before Luntz gathered this group of our more mal-informed fellow primates, the new Republican majority in the Missouri state legislature made one of its first orders of business the repeal of a ballot initiative that established a series of regulations governing the state’s notorious “puppy mills.” Yes, there are conservative legislators out in the American heartland who take it upon themselves to go against the expressed will of the electorate in order to come out in favor of torturing puppies. Of course, many of these people likely will be delegates to the 2012 Republican National Convention, where they will choose a nominee and, if there is a just god paying attention, get bitten in the balls by a police dog…
Click the link for more excellent snark, and an illustration that makes me wonder whether Donald Trump’s newborn “exploratory campaign” might not be based largely on a potentially lethal case of Hair Envy.
“Ladies and Gentlemen, the GOP Dogfight Has Commenced”Post + Comments (20)