Archives for 2014

Random Paul’s latest is a comparison of Obama’s immigration order to Roosevelt’s Japanese-American internment order. Since it’s obvious that giving undocumented immigrants the opportunity to earn citizenship is almost the same thing as locking them up in a prison camp, perhaps I shouldn’t be criticizing the lesser Paul’s latest emission. But my critique is stylistic, not substantive, to wit: Do these fucking wingnuts know that there are other wars in American history besides World War II?

It’s always Hitler this, Hitler that, Manzanar this, Manzanar that with these people. Yet, believe it or not, American soldiers have fought and died in other places and at other times. For example, I would have thought the best comparisons for the last few years of politics would come from the trench warfare stalemates of World War I. “Obama’s failure to invite Mitch McConnell and John Boehner over for cocktails has turned the relationship between the White House and Congress into a modern day Western Front.” See, it wasn’t so hard. And Yahweh knows that Japanese internment is not the only case of war-related American cruelty to other Americans. Andersonville springs to mind, though I realize that bringing up the Civil War in any context other than the rightness of flying the stars and bars is a bit risky for civil rights stalwarts like Aqua Buddha.

If we’re going to have to listen to another two years of frothing at the mouth horseshit, I think we should expect, or even demand, that the wingnuts step it up. Let’s assign the different factions a war. The anti-abortion wackos get Korea, because nobody can stretch an analogy like those nutcases, and there’s going to be some stretching involved (“Abortion is to fetuses like the Chinese crossing the Yalu River was to the UN forces”). Vietnam goes to the warmongers like McCain, who never learn from anything. Southern Republicans get the Civil War because, obviously, they’re still fighting it. There aren’t enough Teabaggers to keep the Revolutionary War, so they must be re-assigned to a minor conflict–let’s say the Spanish American War. The anti-gay fanatics get the War of 1812, because it was still being fought after it was essentially over. I could go on, but you get the picture.

It’s Always WW II With These AssholesPost + Comments (140)