• Menu
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Before Header

  • About Us
  • Lexicon
  • Contact Us
  • Our Store
  • ↑
  • ↓
  • ←
  • →

Balloon Juice

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

This fight is for everything.

Republicans don’t want a speaker to lead them; they want a hostage.

Bark louder, little dog.

Historically it was a little unusual for the president to be an incoherent babbling moron.

… pundit janitors mopping up after the gop

The Supreme Court cannot be allowed to become the ultimate, unaccountable arbiter of everything.

Text STOP to opt out of updates on war plans.

Donald Trump found guilty as fuck – May 30, 2024!

And now I have baud making fun of me. this day can’t get worse.

If you voted for Trump, you don’t get to speak about ethics, morals, or rule of law.

These days, even the boring Republicans are nuts.

They traffic in fear. it is their only currency. if we are fearful, they are winning.

So many bastards, so little time.

“Until such time as the world ends, we will act as though it intends to spin on.”

One way or another, he’s a liar.

Republicans: slavery is when you own me. freedom is when I own you.

He wakes up lying, and he lies all day.

Their freedom requires your slavery.

The media handbook says “controversial” is the most negative description that can be used for a Republican.

A thin legal pretext to veneer over their personal religious and political desires.

Every one of the “Roberts Six” lied to get on the court.

It’s the corruption, stupid.

“The defense has a certain level of trust in defendant that the government does not.”

“But what about the lurkers?”

Mobile Menu

  • Seattle Meet-up Post
  • 2025 Activism
  • Targeted Political Fundraising
  • Donate with Venmo, Zelle & PayPal
  • Site Feedback
  • War in Ukraine
  • Submit Photos to On the Road
  • Politics
  • On The Road
  • Open Threads
  • Topics
  • COVID-19
  • Authors
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Lexicon
  • Our Store
  • Politics
  • Open Threads
  • 2025 Activism
  • Garden Chats
  • On The Road
  • Targeted Fundraising!
You are here: Home / Gun Issues / Gun nuts / Open Thread: Live Free or Shoot Your Mouth Off

Open Thread: Live Free or Shoot Your Mouth Off

by Anne Laurie|  April 19, 20138:25 pm| 54 Comments

This post is in: Gun nuts, Open Threads, Vagina Outrage, Assholes

FacebookTweetEmail

Jinx attempt — let’s see if putting this thread up prompts a resolution in Watertown.

As a liberal, fairness requires me to point out that New Hampshire has “the third-largest legislature in the English speaking world”, which means one representative for every 3,300 residents, 2,937 of whom could not pick them out of a police lineup. As a Masshole, I am required to point and laff whenever some Granite(headed) Staters go full-metal FREEEEEDUMB! Snooty elitist NYMag reports:

New Hampshire Republicans are less than thrilled about the state legislature’s recent vote to repeal stand-your-ground laws, which protect your right to shoot other people in self-defense without trying to retreat or flee first. For example, State Representative Peter Hansen wants to know: Who will think of the vaginas and children?

In response to an opponent’s anti-stand-your-ground speech, Hansen e-mailed the all-legislature listserv the following, obtained by a local blogger Susan the Bruce (h/t Salon):

“What could possibly be missing from those factual tales of successful retreat in VT, Germany, and the bowels of Amsterdam? Why children and vagina’s of course. While the tales relate the actions of a solitary male the outcome cannot relate to similar situations where children and women and mothers are the potential victims.”

…After a fellow lawmaker chastised Hansen for being crude on a legislative listserv, he replied-all:

“Having a fairly well educated mind I do not need self appointed wardens to A: try to put words in my mouth for political gain and B: Turn a well founded strategy in communication into an insulting accusation, and finally if you find the noun vagina insulting or in some way offensive then perhaps a better exercise might be for you to re-examine your psyche.”

To which we will only add that Hansen sounds like a total penis. A penis who can’t punctuate.

Of course (h/t Wonkette) Rep. Hansen has fellow believers standing athwart the tide of history, and those fellows are embarrassing even the other NooHampsters, as reported in a Nashua Telegraph editorial:

NH GOP back in news – for the wrong reason
…[W]e learned last week that three disgruntled Republican lawmakers – including two from Greater Nashua – actually thought it was a good idea to file a formal petition of removal and criminal complaints against 189 of their fellow representatives.

Specifically, Londonderry Rep. Al Baldasaro, Goffstown Rep. John Hikel and Merrimack Rep. Lenette Peterson filed an “emergency petition for redress,” calling for removing the 189 from office for “breaching their oath” and for their criminal prosecution for “violating federal law.”

The offense?

Voting for legislation that would reset the standard for self-defense to what had existed with little fanfare for more than three decades. They claim any change would violate their right to bear arms to protect themselves and their property…

And if that weren’t kooky enough, former Republican Party Chairman Jack Kimball and several similarly offended lawmakers filed criminal complaints last week in the Hillsborough and Strafford county sheriffs’ offices against Shurtleff, the sponsor of the bill, and the 188 lawmakers who supported it.

Fortunately, it is clear House Republican leaders want nothing to do with this embarrassment. When asked about it Friday, House Minority Leader Gene Chandler, of Bartlett, said not only hadn’t he read the petition, but that it had “nothing to do with the caucus leadership in any form.” …

Guess it’s up to the bold defenders of the Free State Project to mass in their millions handfuls and speak up for the freedom of vaginas to shoot first and ask questions afterwards…

FacebookTweetEmail
Previous Post: « Boston Open Thread
Next Post: Boston Suspect in Custody »

Reader Interactions

54Comments

  1. 1.

    aimai

    April 19, 2013 at 8:28 pm

    The city of cambridge just called and lifted the ban on leaving our houses. I guess its over or they know its coming to an end.

  2. 2.

    PeakVT

    April 19, 2013 at 8:31 pm

    “What could possibly be missing from those factual tales of successful retreat in VT, Germany, and the bowels of Amsterdam?

    What the hell is that moron talking about?

  3. 3.

    Xecky Gilchrist

    April 19, 2013 at 8:35 pm

    The use of the noun “vagina” would be inoffensive if:

    a) he wasn’t using it as a pejorative term for women
    b) he didn’t use an apostrophe to make it plural.

  4. 4.

    Scotius

    April 19, 2013 at 8:36 pm

    @PeakVT: I was wondering the same thing. It’s like he ran that sentence through a word randomizer.

  5. 5.

    Violet

    April 19, 2013 at 8:37 pm

    Boston GLobe twitter:

    BREAKING NEWS: Globe photographer can hear police say, “We know you’re in there. Come out on your own terms. Come out with your hands up.”

  6. 6.

    Lee Rudolph

    April 19, 2013 at 8:37 pm

    @PeakVT: Well, I assume that VT = Vermont, with which its neighbor New Hampshire has issues. Otherwise, dunno.

  7. 7.

    Sad_Dem

    April 19, 2013 at 8:38 pm

    Has a researcher discovered why so many people of a certain political persuasion have such trouble with argument, grammar, and spelling?

  8. 8.

    PeakVT

    April 19, 2013 at 8:39 pm

    @Lee Rudolph: I know the wingnuts over there hate us hippie commies over here, but I was wonder if there was some particular incident (real or imaginary) that he might be referring to.

  9. 9.

    jl

    April 19, 2013 at 8:40 pm

    The beginning of the email from one of the links:

    ” There were two critical ingredients missing in the illustrious stories purporting to demonstrate the practical side of retreat. Not that retreat may not be possible mind you. What could possibly be missing from those factual tales of successful retreat in VT, Germany, and the bowels of Amsterdam? ”

    What does ‘bowels of Amsterdam’ mean? I guess that the suburbs of Amsterdam, or the countryside are unforgiving wilderness?’

    What is he talking about? Has he gone all NRA and no limits at all on firearms and their use, including strong ‘stand your ground’ laws, so the good citizens can protect themselves from the Zombie Apocalypse which is due any day now?

  10. 10.

    Anne Laurie

    April 19, 2013 at 8:42 pm

    @Sad_Dem:

    Has a researcher discovered why so many people of a certain political persuasion have such trouble with argument, grammar, and spelling?

    In that sense, ours is a truly representative government. You ever have to copyedit a report by your average MBA? Or even some liberal art grad students?

  11. 11.

    jl

    April 19, 2013 at 8:42 pm

    @jl:

    Sorry, WP isn’t letting me edit my own comment. Damn you Tunch! Anyway, meant to type:

    ” gone all NRA and wants no limits at all on firearms and their use, “

  12. 12.

    Dee Loralei

    April 19, 2013 at 8:43 pm

    Alive and in custody

  13. 13.

    Michele C

    April 19, 2013 at 8:44 pm

    @Xecky Gilchrist: Exactly. Correct apostrophe usage: “Hansen’s penis is a substitute for his brain.”

  14. 14.

    Bruce S

    April 19, 2013 at 8:44 pm

    Seems to have worked.

  15. 15.

    Violet

    April 19, 2013 at 8:44 pm

    Jinx attempt — let’s see if putting this thread up prompts a resolution in Watertown.

    It worked! Suspect in custody and alive.

  16. 16.

    f space that

    April 19, 2013 at 8:44 pm

    Is Aunt Pitty Pat on the way to Watertown to oversee the booking ?

  17. 17.

    max

    April 19, 2013 at 8:45 pm

    Jinx attempt — let’s see if putting this thread up prompts a resolution in Watertown.

    WELL-PLAYED!

    max
    [‘They got him alive. Good.’]

  18. 18.

    kdaug

    April 19, 2013 at 8:45 pm

    Your jinx powers are most impressive, Anne Laurie.

  19. 19.

    hildebrand

    April 19, 2013 at 8:46 pm

    Let’s do this the right way – be a nice change of pace from the previous administration.

  20. 20.

    poco

    April 19, 2013 at 8:46 pm

    It worked–the kid is alive and in custody.

    Kudos AL!!

  21. 21.

    Michele C

    April 19, 2013 at 8:46 pm

    @Anne Laurie: I had one argue with me that the passive voice “sounds smarter.”

  22. 22.

    scav

    April 19, 2013 at 8:46 pm

    @jl: Normally I’d think basements or sewers — The Bowels de Paris would be a grand setting for Victor Hugo. Bowels of Amsterdam would be downright soggy. No wonder the guns were useless. “keep your powder dry.” and “swim your canal!”

  23. 23.

    TaMara (BHF)

    April 19, 2013 at 8:47 pm

    You did it.

  24. 24.

    PsiFighter37

    April 19, 2013 at 8:48 pm

    I’m toast.

    PF37 +5

  25. 25.

    Mary G

    April 19, 2013 at 8:49 pm

    You have a mighty power, Anne Laurie. Use it wisely.

  26. 26.

    Poopyman

    April 19, 2013 at 8:50 pm

    @hildebrand: Yes, and I so want law enforcement to rub McConnell’s face in it. We’re going to follow the law.

  27. 27.

    aimai

    April 19, 2013 at 8:50 pm

    Wow. Hats off toyou, Annie Laurie. Pretty amazing work. And hats off to the BPD and FBI for getting him out alive. May he live a long time with his regrets, knowing he is a shame to his family and his friends.

  28. 28.

    Elizabelle

    April 19, 2013 at 8:51 pm

    The force is with you, Miss Anne Laurie.

    Who thinks Boston pubs are going to do a good business tonight?

  29. 29.

    Bruce S

    April 19, 2013 at 8:51 pm

    18 minutes & 12 posts – Bingo! The motherfucker didn’t have a chance.

    (Corrected.)

  30. 30.

    Enhanced Voting Techniques

    April 19, 2013 at 8:53 pm

    @PeakVT:

    “What could possibly be missing from those factual tales of successful retreat in VT, Germany, and the bowels of Amsterdam?

    What the hell is that moron talking about?

    He might be talking about the rise of Hitler in Germany in the 1930’s and the German invasion of Holland in 1940, maybe. They do go Hitler on everything.

  31. 31.

    kdaug

    April 19, 2013 at 8:54 pm

    @Sad_Dem:

    Has a researcher discovered why so many people of a certain political persuasion have such trouble with argument, grammar, and spelling?

    Yep. 1931. Aldous Huxley, wrote a book about some brave new something or another.

    He called ’em Epsilon Semi-Morons.

  32. 32.

    Spaghetti Lee

    April 19, 2013 at 8:54 pm

    @Elizabelle:

    And with 4/20 tomorrow, no less. I think the whole country needs some catharsis after this fuckshow of a week, Boston especially.

  33. 33.

    HinTN

    April 19, 2013 at 8:55 pm

    aitch + 3 = I hate this carpet bombing!

  34. 34.

    Jay C

    April 19, 2013 at 8:55 pm

    Good on you, AL!

    Can you start working on a post re Afghanistan next?

  35. 35.

    scav

    April 19, 2013 at 8:56 pm

    Huzzah for the Law and follow it. following @Poopyman:

  36. 36.

    Felonius Monk

    April 19, 2013 at 8:57 pm

    three disgruntled Republican lawmakers

    Sounds like 3 jack-offs having a less than successful circle-jerk.

  37. 37.

    max

    April 19, 2013 at 8:57 pm

    @aimai: And hats off to the BPD and FBI for getting him out alive. May he live a long time with his regrets, knowing he is a shame to his family and his friends.

    Amen.

    max
    [‘BG says binky was alive and conscious when captured.’]

  38. 38.

    Jay C

    April 19, 2013 at 8:57 pm

    And not to rub it in re John’s last post too much, but it looks (as of now) like Dzhokhar HAS been taken alive. Though what condition he’s in is unknown. My guess is that it’s something like “not good”….

  39. 39.

    hildebrand

    April 19, 2013 at 8:58 pm

    @Poopyman: We need to show the rest of the world (and ourselves) that we can do this without resorting to barbarism. Read him his rights, follow the rules, put him on trial, get the conviction with solid, verifiable evidence. If we say we follow the rule of law, let us follow the rule of law. That is how we get people to think differently about the US.

  40. 40.

    Elizabelle

    April 19, 2013 at 8:59 pm

    @Spaghetti Lee:

    Somehow you can always count on a memorable April 19th, but this was astounding.

    And we’re not even talking about Texas or the Elvis impersonator.

  41. 41.

    max

    April 19, 2013 at 9:03 pm

    @Elizabelle: Somehow you can always count on a memorable April 19th, but this was astounding.

    There’s something about the third week in April and the second week of September that is all fucked up. No idea why.

    max
    [‘An end to this year’s Black Week of April is a very good thing.’]

  42. 42.

    Lee Rudolph

    April 19, 2013 at 9:07 pm

    @PeakVT: A spectre is haunting Vermont, the spectre of Single Payer. Or so I’ve heard tell.

  43. 43.

    GregB

    April 19, 2013 at 9:09 pm

    @hildebrand:

    Amen to that.

  44. 44.

    Yutsano

    April 19, 2013 at 9:14 pm

    Open thread? Open thread.

    So I got the official word about the furlough notice. So far looking like five unpaid Fridays so far, two around holidays, possibly more if they think they’ll be necessary. August is gonna suck donkey balls. Good thing I might be moving and only have to put up the difference in my last month’s rent.

  45. 45.

    Xecky Gilchrist

    April 19, 2013 at 9:14 pm

    @Sad_Dem: Has a researcher discovered why so many people of a certain political persuasion have such trouble with argument, grammar, and spelling?

    I’ve noticed one common wingnut troll “tell” is that they can’t ever use a comma between a comment addressed to someone and that person’s name, e.g. where it should be “Why don’t you go soak your head, Xecky” they’ll write “Why don’t you go soak your head Xecky.” It’s not universal, and it’s not only wingnuts that do that, but it strikes me as highly correlated.

  46. 46.

    Another Halocene Human

    April 19, 2013 at 9:18 pm

    Good police work. Exactly what we should have had more of after 9/11, instead of a mendacious CinC, disorganized intelligence agencies, misdirected military response, and everyone from congresspeople to local police agencies setting their hair on fire.

  47. 47.

    Another Halocene Human

    April 19, 2013 at 9:22 pm

    @Yutsano: That sucks. God, I wish this austerity shit would end.

  48. 48.

    Another Halocene Human

    April 19, 2013 at 9:26 pm

    “I saw cars coming down, the logos, towns I never heard of…”

    Teenage Watertown resident on WBZ talking about how grateful he is for the out-of-town cops who came to assist.

    Just imagining him scratching his head, “Me-THUNE??”

  49. 49.

    Another Halocene Human

    April 19, 2013 at 9:28 pm

    @Poopyman: Not to mention Graham’s.

  50. 50.

    JGabriel

    April 20, 2013 at 1:47 am

    max:

    There’s something about the third week in April and the second week of September that is all fucked up.

    And August, as Molly Ivins noted.

  51. 51.

    ajhil

    April 20, 2013 at 8:02 am

    @Scotius: Sad, but true, Scotius. However, your critique might pack a little more punch, if you’d avoided misusing the preposition “like” to introduce a subordinate clause!

  52. 52.

    The Ancient Randonneur

    April 20, 2013 at 11:44 am

    I know this thread is more than 15 hours old but I want to go back to your original point about the NH legislature. The fact that House members represent about 3300 residents each is also one of the reasons the NH legislature also has a much higher percentage of female membership than either VT or MA or any other state for that matter! In 2008 NH became the FIRST state to have elected a majority of women to the State Senate. So poke fun at us if you must but please recall that NH is also the first state to have an all female DC Congressional delgation not to mention our great new Governor Maggie Hassan! Sure Ayotte is a Republican but the fact still remains that she is a woman. Seems pretty “progressive” to me. Wasn’t it the much more liberal Massahusetts that turned down a qualified Democratic woman for a pretty boy Republican to take the seat of the Liberal Lion?

  53. 53.

    Anne Laurie

    April 20, 2013 at 11:16 pm

    @The Ancient Randonneur: You are correct, sir or madam. However, while some of my best friends are proud to live in New Hampshire, I retain my loyalty to the Commonwealth of Massachusetts!

  54. 54.

    Sondra

    April 22, 2013 at 2:00 pm

    @Sad_Dem:
    Because they don’t cherish the benefits of a good liberal arts education?

Comments are closed.

Primary Sidebar

On The Road - PaulB - Olympic Peninsula: Salt Creek Recreation Area & Kalaloch Beach
Image by PaulB (5/10/25)

Recent Comments

  • lowtechcyclist on Dank Grey Dawn Open Thread : Shut Up, Comey (May 16, 2025 @ 8:03am)
  • Spanky on Dank Grey Dawn Open Thread : Shut Up, Comey (May 16, 2025 @ 8:01am)
  • Trivia Man on Dank Grey Dawn Open Thread : Shut Up, Comey (May 16, 2025 @ 8:00am)
  • Manyakitty on Dank Grey Dawn Open Thread : Shut Up, Comey (May 16, 2025 @ 7:57am)
  • MagdaInBlack on Dank Grey Dawn Open Thread : Shut Up, Comey (May 16, 2025 @ 7:55am)

PA Supreme Court At Risk

Donate

Balloon Juice Posts

View by Topic
View by Author
View by Month & Year
View by Past Author

Featuring

Medium Cool
Artists in Our Midst
Authors in Our Midst
War in Ukraine
Donate to Razom for Ukraine

🎈Keep Balloon Juice Ad Free

Become a Balloon Juice Patreon
Donate with Venmo, Zelle or PayPal

Meetups

Upcoming Ohio Meetup May 17
5/11 Post about the May 17 Ohio Meetup

Calling All Jackals

Site Feedback
Nominate a Rotating Tag
Submit Photos to On the Road
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Links)
Balloon Juice Anniversary (All Posts)
Fix Nyms with Apostrophes

Hands Off! – Denver, San Diego & Austin

Social Media

Balloon Juice
WaterGirl
TaMara
John Cole
DougJ (aka NYT Pitchbot)
Betty Cracker
Tom Levenson
David Anderson
Major Major Major Major
DougJ NYT Pitchbot
mistermix

Keeping Track

Legal Challenges (Lawfare)
Republicans Fleeing Town Halls (TPM)
21 Letters (to Borrow or Steal)
Search Donations from a Brand

PA Supreme Court At Risk

Donate

Site Footer

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

  • Facebook
  • RSS
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Comment Policy
  • Our Authors
  • Blogroll
  • Our Artists
  • Privacy Policy

Copyright © 2025 Dev Balloon Juice · All Rights Reserved · Powered by BizBudding Inc

Share this ArticleLike this article? Email it to a friend!

Email sent!