Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

The National Guard is not Batman.

Lick the third rail, it tastes like chocolate!

Baby steps, because the Republican Party is full of angry babies.

Polls are now a reliable indicator of what corporate Republicans want us to think.

The arc of history bends toward the same old fuckery.

Motto for the House: Flip 5 and lose none.

Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

Weird. Rome has an American Pope and America has a Russian President.

Finding joy where we can, and muddling through where we can’t.

Whatever happens next week, the fight doesn’t end.

You cannot love your country only when you win.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires republicans to act in good faith.

When you’re a Republican, they let you do it.

You don’t get rid of your umbrella while it’s still raining.

It’s the corruption, stupid.

Republicans firmly believe having an abortion is a very personal, very private decision between a woman and J.D. Vance.

There are times when telling just part of the truth is effectively a lie.

Someone should tell Republicans that violence is the last refuge of the incompetent, or possibly the first.

One of our two political parties is a cult whose leader admires Vladimir Putin.

When I decide to be condescending, you won’t have to dream up a fantasy about it.

You are so fucked. Still, I wish you the best of luck.

Disagreements are healthy; personal attacks are not.

This isn’t Democrats spending madly. This is government catching up.

Balloon Juice, where there is always someone who will say you’re doing it wrong.

You are here: Home / Economics / C.R.E.A.M. / Late Night Thieves’ Paradise Open Thread: SPACE PIRATES!!!

Late Night Thieves’ Paradise Open Thread: SPACE PIRATES!!!

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There’s a joke to be made that Ted Cruz might possibly be a space alien in a badly-designed human suit, but seriously: even TV Tropes doesn’t take ‘Space Pirates’ seriously.

Of course, Raphael ‘Ted’ Cruz is taking the resulting online abuse predictably:


 
Presumably related, somehow, to Cruz’s new boogeymonsters (note Rep. Johnson’s home state):

“Education – feh! SPACE PIRATES, pew pew pew!”

Reader Interactions

47Comments

  3. 3.

    Yutsano

    @Mike J: No oxygen. No freeze dried food. No radiation protection.

    Yes I’m going to be bitter as fuck about Beto not beating him. But let the idiots in Texas enjoy their embarrassment from the Canadian carpetbagger.

  4. 4.

    joel hanes

    No longer even rise to the level of “irritable impulses”.

    This is just random.

  5. 5.

    Mart

    Yeah, fisherman skiffs armed with desperate men with AK-47’s – orbital intercept missiles – pretty much the same thing. I am starting to get Ted Cruze. Visionary!

  7. 7.

    Steeplejack

    Just watched an interesting documentary about Annie Oakley on PBS’s American Experience. Check your local listings. Recommended.

  8. 8.

    SiubhanDuinne

    I had seen references to that … thing … on Rafael’s face, but until watching the video clip just now I hadn’t actually seen it. And now I am yearning for my lost innocence.

  9. 9.

    Ruckus

    @Yutsano:

    But let the idiots in Texas enjoy their embarrassment from the Canadian carpetbagger.

    The idiots are enjoying Tad Cruz, but then they are idiots.

  11. 11.

    Steeplejack

    I have no idea why Disney XD has Phineas and Ferb on in the middle of the night, but it’s awfully seductive. Especially this one-hour crossover with the Marvel universe. Doofenshmirtz and the Red Skull? Nick Fury and Perry the platypus? WTF.

    The superheroes’ powers get swapped.

    Phineas: And Hulk got Iron Man’s powers. But without the suit there’s not much there.

    Hulk: I am feeling entrepreneurial.

    All kids’ shows should be this good.

  15. 15.

    Steve in the ATL

    @Duane: they did two years of incalculable dommage (Lol) when they held all three branches. We really, really need the senate though.

  17. 17.

    Steeplejack

    @Sebastian:

    I like Phineas and Ferb in general. Waiting for the niece and nephew to catch up. They’re still at Bubble Guppies and Paw Patrol.

  23. 23.

    Wayne Marks

    Ummm…. why would the Senator from Texas, which includes, you know Houston, be against a space program?

    Houston, we have a problem.

  24. 24.

    Sebastian

    @Duane:

    I don’t know. We might be looking at widespread unrest.

    One thing that always keeps me going is the knowledge that they cannot win because in order for them to win NY and CA would have to capitulate.

  25. 25.

    Jay

    @Wayne Marks:

    He’s pro-Space Force because of Space Pirates.

    And a moron.

    He can’t hold the idea of NASA, Huston, Space in his head at the same time as Space Farce, Space Pirates and rimming Needy Amin.

  26. 26.

    Jay

    @Duane:
    @Steve in the ATL:
    @Sebastian:

    They had the House under Needy Amin, for two years and pretty much only got Tax Cuts for Billionaires and Corporations, with some minor ACA fuckery.

    “Obama and his Democratic allies in Congress compiled a substantial record of policy accomplishment—the economic stimulus, bringing the financial system back from the brink of collapse, rescuing two automakers, universal health care, sweeping reform of financial regulation, and major changes in student loan programs, among many others. ”

    google.ca/amp/s/www.brookings.edu/research/president-barack-obamas-first-two-years-policy-accomplish…

  27. 27.

    JoyceH

    I saw Ted Cruz explaining that we need the Space Force to protect “space commerce” (which doesn’t exist) from “space pirates” (which also doesn’t exist) – and I tried to come up with an instance where a government created a program to deal with a problem that didn’t exist yet. I came up dry. Can anyone think of an example?

  28. 28.

    Jay

    @JoyceH:

    Eisenhower built the Interstate System before there were large amounts of interstate traffic, private or commercial.

    Kevin Cosner built a baseball field before there were ghost baseball players.

  30. 30.

    NotMax

    @JoyceH

    Japanese internment.

    Swine flu scare.

    Just two (of obviously disproportional gravity) off the top o’ the noggin.

  31. 31.

    Sebastian

    @Jay:

    True and those two years were filled with activism and marches and protest. That’s all gone now. All we do is sit and watch.

  32. 32.

    Plato

    The entire party has become a group of gutless cowards dancing to the dunce’s stupid tunes.

  36. 36.

    NotMax

    @BillinGlendaleCA

    The challenge posed was for an example of “a government created a program to deal with a problem that didn’t exist yet.” Belief or lack of same, whether merited or not, was not a stipulation

  39. 39.

    SFAW

    I think y’all are missing the big picture: with the new big interest in Space Ghost Force, that makes it that much more likely that Firefly will be back.

    Of course, with Wash dead (sorry for the spoiler) and Ron Glass having passed on, it will probably suck.

    Space Pirates. JHC, what a fucking moron.

  41. 41.

    SFAW

    @?BillinGlendaleCA:

    Quite a few folk at the time thought that the Japanese internment addressed a problem.

    Well, it did. In much the same way that voter suppression laws address a problem.

  43. 43.

    H.E.Wolf

    @Sebastian:

    True and those two years were filled with activism and marches and protest. That’s all gone now. All we do is sit and watch.

    I’m late and this thread is extinct. However: when someone says that, 99% of the time they’re (a) male, (b) ignoring what women are doing, and (c) doing squat, themselves.

  46. 46.

    Bill Arnold

    Senator Ted Cruz thinks those of us concerned about climate change are alarmist, but he’s adamant that the nation invest in protection against space pirates

    Senator Cruz might be worried that those “space pirates” are high-tech environmentalists, and that they oppose fossil fuel interests.

  47. 47.

    J R in WV

    @Wayne Marks:

    Ummm…. why would the Senator from Texas, which includes, you know Houston, be against a space program?

    Houston, we have a problem.

    You misunderstand, Senator Rafael is wholly in favor of a Space Force, literally in case of Space Pirates.

    Yet he is completely opposed to doing anything about Global Climate Change, which he claims is a fiction, a hoax being drummed up by lieberals to… something, something… bla, bla…

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