I’m treating tonight like Friday as this is a four day week-end, so if you expect something substantive from me, move on. I do want to pass on this little tale:
A repeat public indecency offender has been arrested for allegedly engaging in “sexual activity” with a pink inflatable swimming pool raft, according to Hamilton police.
Edwin Charles Tobergta, 32, was arrested at his Harmon Avenue home early Sunday after he was spotted in the act in an alley in the 1800 block of Howell Avenue behind a residence, a police report shows.
A male witness, who owns the raft and lives in the home near the alley, told Hamilton Police Officer William Thacker he shouted at the suspect to stop.
Tobergta took the raft and fled, the report states.
When police caught up with him, he admitted to the crime and begged for help, according to police.
Putting aside the sadness factor of him begging for help, I’m not sure what is my favorite part of the story. That he was having sex with a raft, that it wasn’t his raft, or that when he was caught, before running, he made sure to take the raft with him. But wait, it gets better:
According to court records, he has four other public indecency charges in Hamilton Municipal Court and another in Butler County.
In one public indecency case in 2002, he was caught having sex with an inflatable pumpkin that was part of a Halloween display.
What happened in the eight years that made him go from a pumpkin to a raft?
And if all you are going to do is tell me I am horrible person and should not be snickering at this, I completely agree. I’m a horrible person.