Come for the politics, stay for the snark.

When do we start airlifting the women and children out of Texas?

Presidents are not kings, and Plaintiff is not President.

Our job is not to persuade republicans but to defeat them.

Balloon Juice has never been a refuge for the linguistically delicate.

The willow is too close to the house.

Optimism opens the door to great things.

Reality always lies in wait for … Democrats.

Never entrust democracy to any process that requires republicans to act in good faith.

Accountability, motherfuckers.

Wow, you are pre-disappointed. How surprising.

Take hopelessness and turn it into resilience.

“More of this”, i said to the dog.

The poor and middle-class pay taxes, the rich pay accountants, the wealthy pay politicians.

Tick tock motherfuckers!

John Fetterman: Too Manly for Pennsylvania.  Paid for by the Oz for Senator campaign.

“Jesus paying for the sins of everyone is an insult to those who paid for their own sins.”

Only Democrats have agency, apparently.

Red lights blinking on democracy’s dashboard

Some judge needs to shut this circus down soon.

The cruelty is the point; the law be damned.

Let me eat cake. The rest of you could stand to lose some weight, frankly.

The words do not have to be perfect.

… pundit janitors mopping up after the GOP

Within six months Twitter will be fully self-driving.

You are here: Home / Archives for 2018

Archives for 2018

Russiagate Open Thread: Happy New Year, Ms. Butina!

by | 133 Comments

This post is in: , ,

If I were Maria Butina, I’m not sure I’d be all that eager to return to the warm embrace of Mother Russia, but then what does an untravelled American like me know about true patriotism?

Per the Washington Post:

… President Vladi­mir Putin, in his New Year’s greeting to President Trump, said he was open to a meeting of the two leaders. Trump canceled a formal meeting with Putin at the Group of 20 summit in Buenos Aires in December over Russia’s seizure of Ukrainian naval vessels and crew.

“Russia-U.S. relations are the most important factor behind ensuring strategic stability and international security,” Putin wrote to Trump on Sunday, in one of many messages to heads of state around the globe…

In December, Russian gun rights activist Maria Butina pleaded guilty to conspiring with a senior Russian official to infiltrate U.S. conservative groups. Butina, 30, is the first Russian national to be convicted of seeking to influence U.S. policy in the run-up to the 2016 election by acting as a foreign agent.

Shortly before Butina pleaded guilty, Putin said she was not known to any of his spy agencies. The Foreign Ministry has gone to great lengths to paint Butina as a political prisoner, notably by launching a wide-ranging social media campaign.

(For the pedants, yes I understand that Orthodox Russia’s real New Year isn’t for another two weeks. But the ‘Relect Trump’ campaign needs a media distraction for when it’s discovered that Lord Smallgloves attended tonight’s big donor party at Mar-A-Largofvckyourself.)

Russiagate Open Thread: Happy New Year, Ms. Butina!Post + Comments (133)

Starting The Countdown

by | 210 Comments

This post is in: ,

The New Year is beginning to creep across the globe, maybe hoping that nobody will notice.

East Asia first –

Kim Jong Un will also give a speech.

And some not-so-happy greetings –

Not quite to Europe yet, but here’s an old German postcard from Tallinn that doesn’t look too different from the Town Hall Square now.

From more recent years past –

https://twitter.com/noboa/status/1079810941368320002

What are you doing in the countdown? What good things happened to you this year? How can we make 2019 better?

Open thread!

 

 

Starting The CountdownPost + Comments (210)

Fuck ‘Em Round-Up: 2018

by | 286 Comments

This post is in: , ,

The mister and I don’t really make New Year’s resolutions. We make and break resolutions all year long, such as “eat healthier” and “get more exercise” and “spend less money.”

But there are people who should make and keep a resolution to just fucking stop [insert bad behavior] in 2019. What follows is a partial list. First up, these motherfuckers:

I don’t mean the subjects of this type of human (garbage) interest piece, who should obviously direct themselves to the nearest conflagration and leap into it forthwith; I mean the editors who green-light pitches for these trash stories.

I actively avoid this type of content but have seen at least 10 stories this year on how Trump supporters can’t get laid. I don’t give a shit. No one gives a shit. The obvious solution is for them to go fuck themselves. Stop telling us about them.

The vacationing Mr. Cole pointed out another species of this media phenomenon early this morning:

A-to-the-fucking-men. Kelly is an unrepentant liar who sold his shriveled husk of a soul for a seat adjacent to a traitorous sociopath, revealing himself to be the small, petty, mendacious worm he was all along in the process. That’s a dog-bites-man story in Trump’s DC. Media, please amplify the voices of their victims instead of participating in the attempted rehabilitation of these vile shit-stains.

Speaking of vile shit-stains, Louis CK is back:

To review, last year, after admitting he jerked off into potted plants in front of appalled female colleagues, CK said: “I have spent my long and lucky career talking and saying anything I want. I will now step back and take a long time to listen.”

As pretty much everyone on Twitter noted, CK apparently meant he’d be listening to unfunny Dennis Miller sets. Anyhoo, here’s hoping he finds himself jerking off in front of ever-smaller crowds in 2019, perhaps capping off his career with a CPAC sploodge-a-thon. Fuck off, already, Louis CK.

There are so many more people and things that need to fuck right the fuck off in 2019, but I’ve got holiday preparations to do, so I’ll leave it to you to enumerate them. Or discuss whatever — open thread!

And, in case I don’t get a chance to check in again before midnight, Happy New Year!

Fuck ‘Em Round-Up: 2018Post + Comments (286)

Warren makes it official

by | 196 Comments

This post is in: , ,

I don’t know if she’ll win the nomination, but of all the contenders so far, she’s got the most fully baked message and proposals I’ve heard. Even if she doesn’t ultimately prevail, I’m glad to see Warren in the mix. The ideas she’s put forward recently — like the Accountable Capitalism Act and the Anti-Corruption and Public Integrity Act — need to be part of the conversation for Democrats.

Open thread!

Warren makes it officialPost + Comments (196)

On the Road and In Your Backyard

by | 11 Comments

This post is in: , ,

Good Morning All,

On The Road and In Your Backyard is a weekday feature spotlighting reader submissions. From the exotic to the familiar, please share your part of the world, whether you’re traveling or just in your locality. Share some photos and a narrative, let us see through your pictures and words. We’re so lucky each and every day to see and appreciate the world around us!

Submissions from commenters are welcome at tools.balloon-juice.com

 

Sorry about Thursday/Friday, I was sick and went to bed early and forgot to post Thursday and then Friday’s I setup the post to publish a day later than desired. At least there was a bonus Saturday post!

For this last day of the year, let’s go out with something nice and blog-appropriate.  Tomorrow we return to Africa from our beloved Compte.

Have a wonderful day, and safe evening. See you next year!

 

show full post on front page

On the Road and In Your BackyardPost + Comments (11)

Monday Morning Open Thread: Counting Down

by | 122 Comments

This post is in: , , ,


Readership capture (literally).

More snippets to cheer us through the last day of 2018…

Monday Morning Open Thread: Counting DownPost + Comments (122)

Day Two In Florida

by | 104 Comments

This post is in: 

So far, I am having a pleasant time in South Beach. I spent a few hours in little Havana today, and had a delightful coffee:

I had a very nice time watching people playing dominos in the park, and spent a good bit of time watching people roll cigars. I picked up a few decent ones for Brian, Tammy’s husband.

Came back, spent some time by the pool, and then ordered Thai food for dinner. Watching Boston Legal and calling it an early night, as my sister is showing up tomorrow for a few days.

Good to see the blog has not blown up.

Day Two In FloridaPost + Comments (104)